|Taken tonight at Jericho's last preschool Christmas performance. I'm one proud momma!|
I've been a bit emotional lately. I am that crazy mom.
I continued working until Jericho was ten months old. I felt the mommy guilt. I was torn. I wanted to be a full time mommy but didn't want to give up my job. After ten months James and I decided that it was time for me to be home with Jericho. There would always be time for me to go back to work. Exactly a week after I resigned, we found out that I was pregnant with Karis. At that time I remember thinking, God's timing is perfect.
Since then I have struggled with the idea that no one will ever hire me again because I've "just been a stay at home mom." I've struggled with my identity because I am not accomplishing tasks or finishing projects or making even a penny. And now, just like that, life is changing and my role as a momma is changing. My time of being a stay at home mom is coming to an end. I'm coming to the the realization that my baby is no longer a baby, while knowing in my heart that he will always be my baby, no matter how old he is. I accept the truth, "it goes too fast, enjoy it while you can."